The trip to NOLA last week went very well.  I’m excited about going back, excited about the work I’m going to be doing and the people I’ll be working with, excited about being in that amazing city again.  They really want to try and put me in this position permanently, so I’ll just have to see what happens.

But I’m struggling with it too.  Some people think it would be good for me.  Other people (namely my boss) think I would be making a big mistake.  That the job will be a dead end or that I won’t be happy.  And I have to admit that his doubts have put a few doubts in my mind too.

Which drives me crazy — there are some people that want all the advice and opinions in the world.  I am not one of those people.  I listen to the advice and the opinions but in the end, I have to find the true answer, the right answer, within myself. 

And right now my mind is clouded and filled with too many voices and I’m frantically trying to handle everything that needs to be handled in the next 3 weeks.  I don’t have the time to second-guess my decision.  I don’t have time to be worried.   The time for analysis and discussion and obsessing is over. 

 Now is the time to take a deep breath, block out everyone else and do what I think is right for ME.  Not for my family or my friends or my boss or the office or my sorority girls or anyone else.  I have to be completely, totally selfish.  And if it’s a mistake, at least it’s a mistake I made on my own terms and I have no one to blame but myself.

It was great to be back in that office.  It was great to see old friends.  It was great to have a new challenge to look forward to.  My gut and my heart are telling me that I need to take this opportunity.  I’m so excited I can hardly stand it and that may not make sense to anyone else but me. 

And I don’t care.  Because right now, I’m the only one that matters.